


that voice which calls to me (and speaks my name)

by ColorfulWarlock



Category: Shadowhunters (TV), The Shadowhunter Chronicles - All Media Types
Genre: 5+1, Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Human, Angst, Cellist Alec Lightwood, Fluff, M/M, Miscommunication, Misunderstandings, Musicians, Pining, Prompt Fic, Roommates, Violinist Magnus Bane
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-12
Updated: 2021-02-13
Packaged: 2021-03-12 13:54:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 6,433
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29385897
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ColorfulWarlock/pseuds/ColorfulWarlock
Summary: Magnus looked at him with a curious, yet soft gaze, as if trying to understand something. Maybe he’d found an answer because soon he nodded and prepared to play that song with Alec.And even when Alec began the first notes, he couldn’t help but think how true that statement was.This song brought you to my life.Maybe it’s the closest thing I’ll have with you.OR,5 times Alec thinks his love is onesided + 1 time he finds out it's not
Relationships: Magnus Bane/Alec Lightwood
Comments: 38
Kudos: 102





	1. Alec

**Author's Note:**

  * For [sugarandspace](https://archiveofourown.org/users/sugarandspace/gifts).



> This story was born from a prompt of the wonderful [Jenna](https://archiveofourown.org/users/sugarandspace)!  
> In a blink of an eye, the plot grew legs and ran away from me.  
> I hope this comes closer to what you had in mind and that you like it, Jenna ❤
> 
> The title is from the lyrics of The Phantom of the Opera's main theme ~  
> This story was not beta'ed, so all mistakes are mine and I'm sorry about that.
> 
> Also also ~ I know I'm not the best with WIPs, _but_ this time you won't need to worry! This story is already finished and I'm going to post the last part tomorrow 😊

Alec has never thought of himself as a lucky guy. His parents had traced his entire life when he was still in Maryse’s womb. He didn’t even get a chance to voice what he really wanted. It was never a matter of _could_ do, but _have to_ do. The Lightwoods came from a very long line of artists and music producers, and success achievement was a daily mantra.

All in the name of family and honor.

When Alec wanted to play the cello, his parents forced him to learn guitar.

When Alec wanted to study classical music, his parents forced him to go into pop.

When Alec wanted to go to operas, his parents forced him to watch variety shows.

When, one day during his last high school year, they announced a potential partner for Alec – ‘ _she is lovely, you will be perfect for each other’_ – for a future engagement, he felt completely and utterly done.

While it was true he was so deep in the closest that it was a wonder how he hasn’t found Narnia yet, Alec had to draw the line. Or else, soon his parents would also start to control if he turned left or right while walking.

Hence the reason he finally snapped and acted behind his parents' back – something he always chided his siblings for doing, but that somehow rubbed on him too. While Maryse and Robert were expecting Alec’s acceptance letter for Julliard School, he had applied for the Royal Academy of Music in London. It would be hard to stay far away from his siblings, but video calls existed for that, and at least he would finally be able to _breathe._

Not only that, but he also applied for cello, his instrument of choice and biggest love. Through the shadows, Alec had learned to master both what his parents wanted and what he wanted (although he never believed he would be able to follow the path of the latter). Guitar and cello, classic and pop, recitals and modern music shows. He knew enough to prove himself and ultimately be accepted where he chose.

After his high school graduation, he packed his things to England and didn’t look back.

**~1~**

Alec groaned after unlocking the door. He was exhausted. Needing the extra money after a sudden rise in the rent of the apartment he currently lived, he began to take extra shifts at night as a bartender. His roommate offered to cover for him, but Alec refused to inconvenience him like that. There was also the option of moving out to a cheaper place, but if he did that…

After taking off his coat and shoes, he looked up to the soft glow of their TV still on. It was casting a variety of colors on the slumped form of his roommate.

_Magnus._

Automatically, Alec’s face softened and a sweet smile curled up his lips.

Alec and Magnus were the same age, and since their first year at the Royal Academy, they got almost all their classes together. And while Alec played the cello, Magnus was brilliant with a violin. They hit it off instantaneously, becoming friends very fast. It was also thanks to Magnus that Alec met new people, and together they formed their own mini-orchestra group – Catarina played the piano; Raphael, the timpani; Dorothea, the clarinet; and Ragnor was their conductor. They all accepted Alec with open arms, which made his life in London much easier. 

Moving silently, in a way that he was very used to, Alec went into their shared bathroom and took some makeup wipes to clean Magnus’ face. Magnus might’ve tried again to watch a rerun of Britain's Got Talent, but the exhaustion of the day caught on him. Alec pressed the wipes gently on the other man’s face and took out all the evidence of eye shadow, mascara, eyeliner, and what he could of glitter. Then, he gathered all takeout containers to throw them at a trash can. Lastly, he took the quilt on the couch’s back and covered Magnus, finally turning the TV off.

Alec squatted down in front of Magnus and lightly brushed his fingers over some strands of hair that fell on Magnus’ forehead.

If Alec moved out, obviously Magnus would stay and look for another roommate. And Alec… would either be alone at a very decadent one-room or, with his bad luck, get the worst roommate ever – it wouldn’t be the first time, considering his terrible experience in a dormitory before moving in with Magnus.

But mainly… If he moved out, he would miss this. This soft side of his roommate he was so blessed to see – without makeup or hair products or shiny clothes. He would miss their bickering over who cooked the worst that week. He would miss rehearsing with Magnus in their living room. Watching movies with him, eating takeout, talking.

He would miss Magnus so much.

His heart fluttered for a moment.

If Magnus knew, would he still want Alec in his life?

**~2~**

“Oh, wow,” Magnus gasped when the pair of siblings appeared – in full gear and ready to kill. Alec couldn’t deny that the girl was pretty, but his eyes were more focused on the guy. As for Magnus, he seemed torn between the two. It was in times like this that Magnus liked to say _‘perks of being bisexual, darling’,_ which never failed to make Alec smile. He had never seen before someone so at ease on their own skin.

Nights like this when they made themselves comfortable on their couch to watch some trash movie or a new series while eating an unhealthy amount of takeout was one of Alec’s favorite things in the entire world. After only three years of knowing Magnus, Alec already felt the happiest compared to his whole life before.

“So, what is your favorite type of guy, Mr. Lightwood?” Magnus teased, making Alec huff out a laugh.

It wasn’t as if he planned to come out just because he crossed the ocean, but it wasn’t so terrifying when he was introduced to a group of people who made him feel safe for the first time in his life.

During the first days of getting to know Magnus better, he found out the other boy was bisexual. Then, there was Raphael who was asexual, and Dot who was pansexual. Cat was still finding herself, and Ragnor was a true enigma – but just for the sake of the joke, they would accuse Ragnor of being straight and spying on their group.

With them, it was easy to just… be.

They’ve never judged him, and even helped him navigate through some of the doubts and insecurities he still had.

It was like breathing without the fear of choking on air. 

“Hmm… I like…” Automatically his eyes met Magnus’, and his first thought was _‘you’._ But what escaped from his mouth was “someone who is magical.”

Magnus squinted his eyes, trying to figure out if Alec was joking or not. When Alec gave him a full grin, Magnus rolled his eyes dramatically and threw a popcorn at his roommate.

Later, both were fast asleep on the couch, limbs at an awkward angle, popcorn covering the floor and smiles reminiscent of teasing, tickles, and a lot of laughing.

**~3~**

The last notes echoed in the air, leaving a warm buzzing on Alec’s fingers and Magnus’ body. They decided to warm up playing a duo rendition of _Rewrite the Stars_ since it was from one of their favorite movies, which helped to brighten that gloomy, rainy day. It was a good thing that Alec had many opportunities when he was younger to practice instrumental versions of pop and other upbeat songs, because Magnus loved them.

Alec has never seen someone _dance_ with such fluidity while playing the violin. Magnus’ whole body moved with such grace while his hands were busy with his instrument, it never failed to take Alec’s breath away.

He was so gone for Magnus.

“So, what now?” Magnus skimmed through their setlist while humming a random melody.

“Canon in D Major,” Alec blurted out, almost cursing himself for the abruptness of it. The inevitable blush also didn’t help his case.

“Don’t get me wrong, my dear. I love to play that song, especially with you, but we play it almost every day. I’m pretty sure that you would be able to play it even if you were in a coma,” Magnus teased, but they both knew it was true. “I’m curious, though. Is there a reason you like it so much?”

Alec opened his mouth, just to close it again. Yes, there was, but could he tell Magnus?

_“All right, class. For your first assignment as freshmen, I’m going to sort you out in pairs and give each pair a different piece to play. Then, search a sheet for your respective instrument and practice the harmony with your partner.” Mr. Carstairs explained while retrieving two blue boxes from under his desk. One had the students’ names and the other, a classical piece._

_One by one, Mr. Carstairs was calling names, and people around began to move to reach their new partner. Alec was a bit nervous; not as much for the random piece he would get – he has always been prepared for surprises, and he was very confident in his capacity to play anything, as foreigner as it could be. No, what put him on edge was pairing with someone. He knew it was something common – working as a team was fundamental for some pieces, but still… He hated how socially awkward he felt sometimes._

_His self-loathing didn’t spiral further thanks to his professor finally picking his name up._

_“Mr. Lightwood with…”_

_He held his breath._

_“Mr. Bane.”_

_Alec noticed said guy perking up four rows down him, and when their eyes met, he felt like all the air vanished from his lungs._

_Wonderful. Not only he would have to interact with someone so soon and so early – for his chagrin, he didn’t even have time for his daily dose of caffeine before coming to class – but his partner was simply the most beautiful man he has seen in his entire life._

_Oh god, he wouldn’t survive college._

_The guy – Bane – grinned so openly and brightly, Alec felt an unavoidable blush heating his cheeks and ears, but before he could feel more mortified about his body’s reaction, his professor’s voice sounded again._

_“Pachelbel’s Canon in D Major.”_

It was the first song they’ve played together, and their performance was…

Alec still dreamed about it.

How their eyes met again once they have finished playing it, similar smiles blooming on their faces. Something that sparkled with hope, warmth, new beginnings. _Home._ Alec had never felt like that before, not even with his siblings – whom he loved more than anything else in the world. A sense of peace and certainty enveloped him.

Alec didn’t believe in love at first sight, but that felt like falling a bit.

It was terrifying.

So, Alec just shrugged, going for nonchalance.

“It’s like a good luck song, I guess.”

Magnus looked at him with a curious, yet soft gaze, as if trying to understand something. Maybe he’d found an answer because soon he nodded and prepared to play that song with Alec.

And even when Alec began the first notes, he couldn’t help but think how true that statement was.

_This song brought you to my life._

_Maybe it’s the closest thing I’ll have with you._

**~4~**

Alec breathed deeply, calming himself before entering the stage. He was about to play alone, in front of a lot of people and a stand of judges. But that was okay. His friends were there in the auditorium. _Magnus_ was there.

_You got this, Lightwood._

After sitting and adjusting his cello in the correct position, he pushed his cloak back and revealed a white half-mask. Many people gasped – and for his delight, Magnus was one of them.

 _The Phantom of the Opera_ was Magnus’ favorite musical, therefore it didn’t require too much thinking for Alec to decide to play the main theme as his final assignment before Winter break. It was a hard piece, but he practiced continuously every day to make it perfect. The hardest part was to do that away from Magnus – Alec really wanted to surprise his roommate since the evaluation was open for the entire department to watch.

Bless Catarina and Dot, who let Alec borrow their apartment so he could practice in secret.

Once he started, he played without thinking too much, losing himself on the notes and strings and emotions.

 _Emotions cloud judgment,_ his mother said once. His parents only viewed music as a way to make money. They managed their artists to only release songs that were dollar-makers, no matter their content. There was a time that Alec thought like that – or maybe he didn’t care as long as he could continue playing.

It wasn’t a surprise that Magnus was the one who taught him that feelings and emotions weren’t a bad thing. They fueled passion and made it easier to connect your music to the audience.

 _When you play with your heart, you touch others’ hearts too,_ Magnus told him once. _You harmonize together. It’s truly beautiful, Alexander._

Alec wondered if he could touch Magnus’ heart now.

After the last note echoed, the ovation was automatic. Everyone got up and cheered for him. Although shyly, Alec smiled, proud of himself. He could see all his friends clapping, waving, and even whistling to him, which made him chuckle. Then, his eyes looked for Magnus and…

Oh.

He was talking to Camille, his face away from the stage.

Camille Belcourt was a very popular soprano student from the Opera department. She was equally beautiful in body and voice. A lot of people were mesmerized by her – from students of all years to professors and other school staff.

And of everyone, of course she was interested in Magnus. Who wouldn’t?

And Magnus… Magnus responded to her. They had the potential to be the prettiest and most popular couple in the academy.

Just the idea was enough to make Alec sick.

Why he ever thought he could have a chance with Magnus?

He was just… Alec. Plain and boring Alec.

Camille whispered something to him, making him laugh. Then, she grabbed his hand and dragged him away.

Magnus hasn’t looked at the stage, at Alec, not even once before disappearing.

Alec’s shoulders drooped, and he wished he was wearing a full-mask to hide his face.

How bittersweet, hm? That like the Phantom, he was condemned to be alone, hidden behind sad chords and longing melodies while the one he loved was going away with another. 

**~5~**

It wasn’t an understatement anymore. Alec was beginning to think that he really didn’t have any luck. Even being separated by an ocean, his parents were still out to give him a headache. His family was falling apart and he desperately needed to go help his three siblings, especially Max, who was still too young to deal with all the bullshit. He was supposed to go to the US one week before Christmas – having the joy of Magnus’ company, who surprisingly accepted his invitation to spend the festivities there.

But now, he had to anticipate his travel for two weeks earlier. And while he had already ended all his school activities, Magnus still had one subject to finish, so he wouldn’t be able to go together with Alec.

Alec sighed. His clothes were scattered all over his bed. He had changed his boarding pass to the day after tomorrow, but he still hasn’t gotten the chance to tell Magnus. His roommate simply… disappeared all day. He was pretty sure Magnus was there in the morning, but then he found himself alone in their apartment.

Odd.

It was already evening, so maybe Magnus was at some fraternity party. It wouldn’t be the first time.

Well, he could tell him the next day.

Alec was about to order some takeout when his phone went off. At seeing Raphael’s name on the screen, Alec frowned. Since when Raphael called someone? Called _him?_

“Raphael? What–”

 _“Come pick your boyfriend before he makes a fool of himself. I’ll text you the address.”_ And then hung up.

“The fuck…” Alec muttered, feeling both very confused and very worried. Was he referring to Magnus? When a text arrived with an attached photo of a seemingly wasted Magnus, he cursed louder.

Opening his terrible excuse of wardrobe, Alec grimaced. He didn’t have a proper outfit for a party, so his black jeans and dark green sweater – the one with less holes – would have to do. He didn’t want to stay there any longer than necessary anyway.

Before leaving, he checked if they still had Advil. Magnus would certainly get a hell of hangover.

Yes, he totally would. The sight of Magnus gulping down – what he was almost suspecting was pure vodka – straight from the bottle was a bad sign. At the other side of the room, Alec could see Camille making out with some older guy that he was fairly sure didn’t even attend their academy.

Ah, that explained Magnus’ bad state. Heartbreak. Yeah, Alec understood pretty well.

Their friends looked as lost as Alec. Ragnor and Catarina tried to drag Magnus twice, but the stubborn man didn’t budge, so Alec was their only hope to persuade him.

_Right, here goes nothing._

“Magnus,” Alec touched his roommate’s shoulder, gently trying to turn him in his direction. Magnus went almost pliantly, but as soon as he looked at Alec, his expression darkened into a scowl.

Okay, that wasn’t exactly the reaction Alec was expecting. Usually, a drunken Magnus was a high flirty Magnus. Not… this upset version one.

“What? Did you come to babysit me before abandoning me?” Magnus snarled, stepping back.

“What?!” Alec gaped. He was very, very confused. “I… I came to take you home. You clearly are not well, Magnus. It’s one thing when you drink just to loosen a bit and have fun, but you’re going to be hammered soon.”

“And why do you care, Lightwood? You were going to leave me anyway, fleeing like some goddamn criminal so you wouldn’t need to take me with you.” Magnus snorted, chugging the bottle again. “It’s not a surprise, is it? If the only person I want doesn't want me, why anybody else would?"

Alec flinched hard as if he had been slapped. Wow. That shouldn't hurt so much, but it did. Listening to Magnus confessing his feelings for Camille was a blow to his heart. Still... Still, Alec wouldn't let Magnus be alone in that state.

“Listen, you can talk about your–” Alec gulped down, the lump on his throat growing painfully. “About your feelings later. Just– Just let me take you home, okay?”

“I won’t go anywhere with you, Alec. You are a fucking liar! I thought… I thought I was reading everything right. Then you had a date with that blonde who plays the harp. Why? Because he looks like an angel with those golden locks while I’m the Devil’s son? Is it the harp? Because his instrument is _bigger?”_ He snickered darkly, don’t even trying to keep his voice low.

Alec paled, his mouth falling slightly open in shock. The fuck? He never went on a date with someone before. And why was he referring to himself like that? Alec knew about the monstrosities Magnus’ father committed, but Magnus was the furthest thing from that demon. So why, why for God’s sake, did Magnus think…

At the corner of his eye, he noticed Camille with the biggest shit-eating grin he’s ever seen in someone.

 _“Fucking manipulative snake.”_ Catarina hissed behind him, and well. He wasn’t surprised at all by that.

“Magnus, Andrew was only lending me a book about–”

“And!” Magnus raised his voice and cut him off, not letting him explain himself. “You were going back to your home by yourself, when we had planned to go together. If you didn’t want me to go, you just had to say it!”

No… Did he know about his change of plans? But…

“Magnus, no. My home isn’t there. It’s here with you, and I was going to tell you tomorrow. I have to go first because–”

“Because daddy and mommy will boost your career. Because the Lightwoods are the highest and mightiest of the society, and you only came here because you decided to be a brat, but now that everything is difficult, you will go back to be the perfect, obedient son they raised. Well, stay there then! Forget the promise we made together!”

“Ma–”

“Get out!"

“Enough!” Ragnor grabbed Magnus by his arm and practically yanked him to the side. Catarina, Raphael, and Dot went to help him before the violinist could do more damage. Magnus tried to argue with his friends, but when he finally relented and was free from them, all the fight leaving his body, it was to turn and face an empty space where Alec was before.


	2. Magnus

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> C O M M U N I C A T I O N  
> It does wonders to the heart

**~+1~**

“Are you better now?”

Magnus blinked lazily. Everything around him seemed so… haze. At a certain point, he might’ve thrown up because he was certainly something has died in his mouth. Someone pushed a cold glass of water onto his hands and he gulped all down like a starving man. Only when things started to make sense again, Magnus realized his hair was wet and he was wearing what he suspected were Ragnor’s clothes.

He grimaced. Ragnor’s fashion sense was atrocious.

“Not the point, your fool,” someone grumbled and – oh – did he say that out loud? Blinking again, his surroundings finally came to focus. He was at Ragnor and Raphael’s apartment. And all his friends were glaring at him.

“Oh no… What have I done now?”

“Nothing at all,” Raphael began, but before Magnus could sag in relief, the boy continued. “Only broke the heart of the guy you’ve been pining since our first year.”

Magnus’ jaw fell, a terrible sense of dread making him feel cold.

Gradually, he began to remember the party. Camille’s venom words to him, poking at each and all of his insecurities. The drinking. Alec.

God, Alec.

Instantaneously, Magnus had to blink his tears away, his heart squeezing horribly inside his chest. He was a total jerk to Alec.

“He… He is never going to forgive me. He must hate me now.” Magnus felt a strong shiver run down his spine and he curled on himself, wishing the ground could swallow him whole. Grabbing his already messed hair, he sobbed. “What I’ve done?”

“You are not a cruel man, Magnus,” Cat started, always their voice of reason. “Alec knows that. You were drunk and hurt. I’m pretty sure that after you talk, things will get better.”

“He will forgive you, but for that you have to apologize first,” Dot added.

“That is, if the boy accepts talk to him,” Ragnor grumbled, then groaned loader after an elbow hit him on his ribs.

“Not helpful, Ragnor!” Cat chided, but Magnus couldn’t blame him for telling what already was a fact in his mind.

 _“Idiota.”_ Raphael let out a long-suffering sigh and threw something at Magnus.

A blanket.

“Sleep,” he ordered but not unkindly. “You are in no state to make a rational decision right now. You can stay here tonight, and tomorrow you fix things with cello boy.”

Magnus was almost accepting when a memory from that morning flashed in his mind.

_He was running late, already skipping breakfast, when something caught his attention on the coffee table._

_Alec’s passport._

_With a boarding pass inside._

_Marking a flight for the day after tomorrow. For New York._

_Only one. Only Alec._

_Moving quietly, Magnus could see from the living room Alec’s bedroom. The door was partially open, so he could see what was happening inside. How Alec was rummaging through things and packing._

_Magnus felt his stomach drop. He couldn’t understand. He wanted to ask his roommate what was happening, but his phone started vibrating and he cursed silently. If he didn’t leave soon, he would miss his test._

_Later. Later he would ask Alec._

And then, at the party, after being treated like trash by Magnus, Alec…

“Oh my God… I have to go.” Magnus got up abruptly and dashed to the door, ignoring his friends’ calls of his name.

It was a small mercy that they all lived in the same block. Magnus didn’t even care that he was running outside, on a December night, with only a pair of sweats and a T-shirt. Barefoot. If he were going to get a cold, at least he hoped it would be for a good reason.

Their apartment was dark. There was no signal of Alec in the living room, kitchen, or bathroom. Magnus went to Alec’s room and… Nothing. Empty. He wasn’t there.

Neither his luggage.

Alec was gone.

“No, no, no…”

 _Think, Magnus,_ **think _._**

Their rooftop. Alec liked to go up there when he was really upset and play his cello alone.

Magnus dashed the stairs, slamming the door open.

Again, nothing. Alec was nowhere. And if his luggage wasn’t too…

“Right! The flight,” he mumbled, already reaching for his phone. If maybe Alec had decided to take the next flight, Magnus could buy a ticket too and…

He didn’t have his phone. He forgot it at Ragnor and Raphael’s home.

His knees gave out and he fell on the cold tiles of the rooftop, finally letting the tears break free.

It was too late.

When Magnus went back to the warmth of his apartment, his body was already too numb – from cold and deep regret – for him to feel any sort of relief. Going straight to his room, he considered sleeping until Christmas, and as he turned the lights on, he froze in place.

This time, not from the cold.

Because Alec… Alec was in _his_ room. Sleeping on _his_ bed.

Magnus was so desperate to find Alec, he never considered looking into his own room. Although, in his defense, it was really the last place he would consider finding the cellist.

“Uh…” he muttered intelligently, a bit lost of how to react. He was already feeling the impending headache due to all that alcohol from the party, and was too emotionally tired to make sense of anything else.

And before he could, Alec was moving and squinting his closed eyes – probably because of the sudden brightness of the room. As soon as Alec realized where he was, his red-rimmed eyes opened very wide, and he promptly got up, fumbling a bit.

“I-I’m sorry. I haven’t noticed, I...” Gulping hard, he tried to bolt from Magnus’ room, however, he didn’t even get a chance to reach the door.

Magnus had reacted at the same time, and before Alec could give more than two steps, Magnus hugged him from behind. Tightly.

“I’m so sorry. Don’t go. Please, don’t leave me. Stay here, please, Alec. Please, please. I’m sorry.” His arms around Alec’s waist were trembling, and Alec felt his heart breaking by the pain and desperation in Magnus’ voice.

“I’m not going anywhere, Magnus.” He tentatively touched the violinist’s arms in an attempt to soothe him.

“But the boarding pass… I thought you had changed it again and was at the airport now.” Magnus rested his face between Alec’s shoulder blades and mumbled on his back. “I thought you were really gone.”

“No, I wouldn’t travel without talking to you first.” Alec sighed. “Let’s talk tomorrow, okay? You aren’t entirely sober and you…”

 _You hurt me a lot tonight._ Magnus could hear the unsaid words.

“Stay?” He asked, knowing Alec would understand his request. It wasn’t about their apartment anymore. Sometimes, when they had a rough night, they slept together. Just that. Sleeping.

And despite having given that night all the reasons for Alec to say ‘no’, his roommate nodded.

He stayed.

When Magnus woke up the next morning, it was to a terrible headache. He opened his eyes slowly, but didn’t need to worry about the sunlight. The curtains were closed, something Alec always did in addition to the glass of water and Advil on Magnus’ bedside table.

That man was an angel and Magnus didn’t deserve him.

But for his disappointment, the other side of his bed was empty. Alec had slept with him and had left before Magnus woke up. For a fleeting moment, his insecurity got the better of him and he thought that Alec didn’t keep his promise and went back to New York.

Fortunately, the wonderful scent of coffee and clattering from the kitchen were proof enough that his roommate was still there.

Magnus scrubbed his face with one hand and got up. He was still wearing Ragnor’s clothes but didn’t bother to change into his. There was… something more important for him to deal with at the moment.

“Hey,” Alec greeted softly when Magnus reached their small kitchen. Coffee was ready and Alec was finishing a second plate of French toast.

God, he wanted to marry that man.

“How are you feeling?”

“Good. Big headache, less of an asshole.” He waved breezily, aiming for a bit of humor. It worked if the brief twitch upwards of Alec’s lips was anything to go by. “I’m sorry, Alexander.”

“You’ve already said that last night. A lot. Even during your sleep.” Alec tried to tease, but it didn’t sound very convincing.

“Not my best moment,” he huffed humorlessly. “I think… I had let too many things bottle up and then… exploded. It’s not an excuse for my behavior but added to it. You didn’t deserve that.”

“No, I didn’t.”

Silence befell on them for a moment while they sat together on the kitchen counter and started digging on their breakfast.

Or, at least, they tried to.

“Was it true? You never went on a date with Andrew?” Magnus poked a blueberry, not daring to look at Alec.

“No. He is a good guy, but I’m not interested in him. And if you haven’t noticed, he is head over heels for Lorenzo.”

“The one who plays French horn?” By Alec’s nod, Magnus scowled. “That isn’t even sexy. Do you know how many bad jokes we can do about that? Nevermind that Lorenzo is a pompous prick.”

Alec chuckled. “You’re just mad that he took your place of honor at the last recital.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Magnus mumbled but smiled a bit. The mood seemed a lot better between them.

Until Alec broke the silence again after a new attempt to eat.

“What about you? Are you in love with Camille?”

“No,” Magnus said with such conviction, it stunned Alec for a moment. “Well, I do have eyes. She is beautiful. I thought it wouldn’t hurt to try a date. See how things would go.” He shrugged. “But Camille… She has a way to get under your skin. We got really drunk, had sex. I remember her saying some things about you, but everything was so confusing and blurred, I think it slipped after. Then, when I saw her at that party making out with another man, I realized I was just… another paw for her. She laughed at my face and mocked me for having feelings.”

Then, as if an afterthought, Magnus decided to go for it.

“Not for her. She must’ve noticed who my heart already belonged to.”

Magnus saw Alec hold his mug tighter, his knuckles turning white.

“I can tell you about them if you explain to me about your change of flight.”

Alec took a long gulp of his coffee, seemingly rearranging his thoughts.

“My parents are getting a divorce. Looks like dad has been cheating on mom for years, and she turned a blind eye in order to keep the appearances. I think I was finally kicked out from the podium of the highest disgrace of my family.”

“Alexander…”

“It’s okay, I don’t really care anymore. I only decided to go back earlier to help my siblings. It will be an ugly battle for Max’s guardianship, and I don’t want to leave him alone in the middle of that mess. Izzy and Jace were already considering leaving New York and coming here too, so I need to see what I can do about Max. Maybe if I strike a deal with Robert and Maryse, I can take care of my little brother.”

Alec turned fully to him, and Magnus’ hands twitched to reach and take his roommate into his arms.

“It was an abrupt decision. I swear Magnus, I was going to tell you. You still have a class here to finish, so I would go first and wait for you in New York.”

Magnus nodded slowly, lowering his gaze.

“What I said to you yesterday… It was uncalled for. I was very rude and cruel. I…” Magnus’ vision blurred, and it was hard to breathe. But he needed to. He needed to force the words out, even if he hated himself for it. “I wanted to hurt you. The supposed date, the boarding pass, Camille, my father’s crimes being exposed in the news again…” He released a shuddering breath. “I felt so betrayed. Without conscious thought, I’ve ended up choosing you to share that kind of pain with me.”

“So you took what I’ve told you before and twisted it to gut me and make me believe?”

Magnus winced. “Yeah. Alec, I hope you know that I don’t think like that.” Being bold again, Magnus dared to put his hand on top of Alec’s. “I’m very, very proud of you. You are the bravest person I know. Fighting for yourself, coming here to study what you want… Darling, I’m so grateful. Because thanks to that? I was able to meet you.”

Magnus expected rage. Expected Alec to retrieve his hand, to shy away from his touch. To hate him. To say what he did was unforgivable.

But oh… His Alexander always surprised him.

Instead, Alec turned his hand so they could entwine their fingers.

“I believe you. What you said… It may take some time to wrap my head around it, but I trust you. Always had, since the beginning, even though I never understood why.”

Then, he gave Magnus one of his trademark lopsided grins. “I forgive you, Magnus.”

Magnus’ entire body sagged in relief, and he really could’ve cried at that moment.

“So…” Alec cleared his throat. “About your crush?”

“Yes, about that.” Magnus tensed again, getting up. “Is it okay if I show you instead of saying?”

Alec nodded, a blank expression on his features. Magnus really hated that look on his face. Mumbling a _‘wait here’,_ he went to get his violin.

When he came back, Alec had moved to their couch to wait for him. Pulling a stool, Magnus put it in front of Alec, so their knees were almost touching.

“It took me some time to learn this, but I hope it’s enough for you to understand.”

As soon as the first notes echoed, Alec’s eyes not only widen but also glazed over with tears.

_“Why would someone take so much effort just to confess their feelings? It’s not easier to just be straightforward and say, ‘I love you’?_

_They were watching yet another rom-com where the male protagonist was organizing an entire flash mob just to declare his undying love for his girlfriend._

_“Sometimes action speaks more than words,” Magnus commented while hugging a pillow. He had a tiny smile, totally enamored by the scene. “Words have shapes and are limited. Sometimes they are not enough when the feeling it’s too much. Isn’t that why we play?”_

_“I suppose…” Alec shrugged, but he didn’t look too much convinced. Magnus turned to him and cocked his head._

_“If you could choose, if not by words, how would you want someone to confess to you?”_

_“Uh… I don’t know? Maybe, if the person could play, I’d like to listen to something beautiful, I guess.”_

_“Like what?” Magnus pressed as if trying to uncover a very deep secret._

_Alec shrugged again and nodded towards the television. The scene had changed and now was playing a romantic song. “That one? It’s good.”_

_“It’s sad!”_

_“But I like it.”_

_War of Hearts._ It was indeed sad yet incredibly beautiful. And now, while Magnus played it, it wasn’t about the lyrics, but the intention.

And Alec understood it.

When the last chords vibrated and the melody finished its dance in the air, Magnus slowly lowered the violin, eyes cast down.

“I could never love Camille because my heart already belonged to you. Since that first day when we got paired to that assignment. Each day I’ve been falling more and more in love with you, but I always thought… I always thought you would never… And when I began to have some _hope_ that maybe I had a chance, everything came crashing down and… and…”

_No more apologies._

“Alexander, I lo–”

He was cut down by lips on his. _Alec’s lips._ Magnus almost sobbed in relief, gladly kissing Alec back and losing himself in that new sensation.

He had dreamed so much about that.

“Magnus, fuck.” Alec breathed when they finally parted for some air, but still keep their foreheads touching. “I’ve been falling for you since that day too. I–” He stopped suddenly and huffed out a laugh. “We are idiots.”

Magnus smiled so brightly, nodding in agreement.

“I’m going to New York tomorrow, but I’ll be waiting for you there. I want to introduce you to my siblings, I want to show you my favorite places. And when we come back, we will begin to work on that promise we made once.”

“The cello and violin duo?” Magnus grinned.

“Yes.” Alec pecked his lips one more time because now he could.

“Great, good talking. Now, as much as I love music, there is another thing I want to be using my hands for, and a different kind of sheet that I want to explore.”

Alec snorted but didn’t contradict him. Actually, he took Magnus’ violin from his hands, putting it on the coffee table, and proceeded to pull his roommate to sit on his lap.

Kissing seemed something as natural as playing melodies now.

And they knew they still had a lot to talk about, about them and everything else that led to the previous night’s outburst, but they also knew it was going to be okay.

They were in tune now.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Now that is over, I can show you the prompt XD (since I didn't want to spoil the ending 🤭)
> 
> _Human AU where they are roommates (oh my god they are roommates!!!) and person A has liked person B for quite a while. They are somewhere (out in public, at a friend's place...) and get into an argument. By the end of it A is really upset and leaves. Person B realises that he went too far and wants to apologise. Person B tries to find Person A and at first he checks their apartment but person A is not in his room or the kitchen or the living room. Person A isn't answering his phone and he's not in any of the other places person B can think of. Person B starts to panic and maybe calls a mutual friend to freak out about how Person A must hate him now (because surprise! Person B likes A just as much!!). Eventually Person B goes back to their apartment, feeling defeated. He goes to his room and finds person A asleep in his (person B's) bed (where he's been the whole time, B just didn't think to check his own room)_
> 
> Aaaand, for those who would like to listen, [here](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K9Wutn5SGEk&ab_channel=AlisonSparrow) you have a violin version of War of Hearts.
> 
> Thank you so much for reading! ❤

**Author's Note:**

> Alec's performance was something similar to [this](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y0csTJvZeq0&ab_channel=CelloDeck%EC%B2%BC%EB%A1%9C%EB%8C%81).
> 
> Come talk to me on my [Tumblr](https://thelightofthebane.tumblr.com/) or [Twitter](https://twitter.com/Lah_Hika)!


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